Islam and Women: Misconceptions and Misperceptions (Part 2/4)
Feature Article
10. Sex with Female War Captives
Among many other misconceptions about Islam is the notion that it gives sanction to slavery and permits its followers to enslave prisoners of war, particularly women and establish extra-marital relations with them. The fact is that Islam has not the slightest link with slavery and concubinage. On the contrary, it completely forbids these practices. It is quite outrageous to associate such barbarities with a religion revealed to upgrade humanity.
The point which needs to be appreciated and which, perhaps, is the real cause of the misconception is that Islam had adopted a gradual process to abolish the institution of slavery because of the social conditions prevalent in Arabia at that time. It must be kept in mind that slavery was an integral part of the pre-Islamic Arab society. There were scores of slave men and women in almost every house. This was largely due to two reasons: First, during those times, the standard practice of dispensing with prisoners of war was to distribute them among the army which captured them. Second, there were extensive slave markets in Arabia in that period where free as well as men and women of all ages were sold like commodities.
In these circumstances, in which slavery had become an essential constituent of the Arab society, Islam adopted a gradual way to eliminate it. An immediate order of prohibition would have created immense social and economic problems. It would have become impossible for the society to cater for the needs of a large army of slaves, who were, otherwise, dependent on various families. Also, the national treasury was in no position to provide them all on a permanent basis. A large number among them were old and incapable of supporting themselves. The only alternative left for them, if they were instantly freed, would have been to turn to beggary and become an economic burden on the society. The question of slave girls and women was even more critical, keeping in view their own low moral standards. Freeing them, all of a sudden, would have only resulted in a tremendous increase in brothels.
Perhaps, the reason behind this gradual eradication can be understood better if one considers the position which interest occupies in the economy of Pakistan today. No one can refute Pakistan’s national economic structure is interest oriented. How the parasite of interest has crippled the national economy is apparent to every keen eye. However, there is no denying the fact that without it our present economic system cannot sustain itself. Every reasonable person will acknowledge that today if a government wishes to rid the economy of this menace then, in spite of its utter prohibition in Islam, it will have to adopt a gradual methodology. During this interim period interest-based deals will have to be tolerated and temporary laws will have to be enacted to handle them, just as the Qur’an had given certain provisional directives about slaves during the interim period of their gradual eradication. An alternative economic framework will have to be steadily incorporated in place of the existing one. A sudden abolition, without another parallel base, will only hasten the total collapse of the economic system, which, of course, will be disastrous for the country.
To avert a similar disaster and to ward off a similar catastrophe, Islam had adopted a progressive and a gradual scheme, fourteen hundred years ago, to do away with the inhuman institution of slavery.
Various directives were given at various stages because of which it gradually became possible for this evil to be eradicated from the society. These are summarized below:[1]
1. In the very beginning of its revelation, the Qur’an regarded emancipation of slaves as a great virtue, and urged people in a very effective way to do so. The tremendous appeal found in the words it adopted ‘فَكُّ رَقَبَة’(release the necks) can be well imagined by a person who has flare for the language. It is evident from the context of such expressions – wherever they are found in the Qur’an – that it has regarded this virtue to be the first as well as the greatest step in pleasing God.[2]
In a similar manner, the Prophet (sws) also urged Muslims to liberate humanity from the yoke of slavery in the following words: ‘Whoever liberated a Muslim slave, the Almighty in return for every limb of that slave would shield every limb of that person from Hell’[3].
2. People were urged that until they free their slaves they should treat them with kindness. The way their masters had total and unchecked control on them in the age of ignorance was put to end. They were told that slaves are human beings too, and no one should in any way violate the rights they possess as human beings.
Abu Hurayrah (rta)narrated from the Prophet (sws): ‘Slaves have a right to food and clothing and he shall not be asked to carry out an errand that is beyond him’[4].
Abu Dharr Ghaffari (rta) narrates from the Prophet (sws): ‘They are your brothers. The Almighty has made them subservient to you. So whatever you eat, feed them with it, whatever you wear, clothe them with it and never ask them to do something which is beyond them and if there is such a task then help them out with it’[5].
Ibn ‘Umar(rta) narrates from the Prophet (sws): ‘Whoever slapped a slave or beat him up should atone this sin by liberating him’[6].
Abu Mas‘ud(rta) says: ‘Once when I was beating my slave I heard a voice from behind me: “O Abu Mas‘ud you should know that the Almighty has more power over you”. When I turned back, I found that it was the Prophet. I immediately remarked: “O Messenger of God, I release him for the sake of God”. The Prophet said: “Had you not done this you would have been given the punishment of the Fire”.’[7]
Ibn ‘Umar(rta) narrates that once a person came to the Prophet (sws) and asked: ‘How many times should we forgive our servant’. [At this], the Prophet kept quiet. He asked again and the Prophet again kept quiet. Upon being asked the third time, he answered: ‘Seventy times in a day’.[8]
3. In cases of un-intentional murder, Zihar, and other similar offences, liberating a slave was regarded as their atonement and sadqah[9].
4. It was directed to marry off slave-men and slave-women who were capable of marriage so that they could become equivalent in status – both morally and socially – to other members of the society.[10]
5. If a person were to marry a slave-woman of someone, great care was exercised since this could result in a clash between ownership and conjugal rights. However, such people were told that if they did not have the means to marry free-women, they could marry, with the permission of their masters, slave-women who were Muslims and were also kept chaste. In such marriages, they must pay their dowers so that this could bring them gradually equal in status to free-women. The Qur’an says:
وَمَنْ لَمْ يَسْتَطِعْ مِنْكُمْ طَوْلًا أَنْ يَنكِحَ الْمُحْصَنَاتِ الْمُؤْمِنَاتِ فَمِنْ مَا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُكُمْ مِنْ فَتَيَاتِكُمْ الْمُؤْمِنَاتِ وَاللَّهُ أَعْلَمُ بِإِيمَانِكُمْ بَعْضُكُمْ مِنْ بَعْضٍ فَانكِحُوهُنَّ بِإِذْنِ أهْلِهِنَّ وَآتُوهُنَّ أُجُورَهُنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ مُحْصَنَاتٍ غَيْرَ مُسَافِحَاتٍ وَلَا مُتَّخِذَاتِ أَخْدَانٍ …ذَلِكَ لِمَنْ خَشِيَ الْعَنَتَ مِنْكُمْ وَأَنْ تَصْبِرُوا خَيْرٌ لَكُمْ وَاللَّهُ غَفُورٌ رَحِيمٌ(25:4)
If any of you have not the means wherewith to wed free believing women, he may wed believing girls from among those whom you own: and Allah has full knowledge about your Faith. You are one from another: wed them with the permission of their owners, and give them their dowers, according to the norms; [the only condition is that] they should be kept chaste, neither being lustful, nor taking paramours … This permission is for those among you who fear sin; but it is better for you that you practice self-restraint. And Allah is Ever-Forgiving, Most Merciful. (4:25)
6. In the heads of Zakah, a specific head ‘الرِّقَاب فِى’ (for [freeing] necks) was instituted so that the campaign of slave emancipation could receive impetus from the public treasury.[11]
7. Fornication was regarded as an offence as a result of which prostitution centers that were operated by people on the basis of their slave-women were shut down automatically, and if someone tried to go on secretly running this business, he was given exemplary punishment.[12]
8. People were told that they were all slaves of Allah and so instead of using the words ‘عَبْد’ (slave-man) and ‘اَمَة’ (slave-woman), the words used should be ‘فَتَى’ (boy/man) and ‘فَتَاة’ (girl/woman) so that the psyche about them should change and a change is brought about in age old concepts.[13]
9. A big source of the institution of slavery at the advent of the last Prophet (sws) was the prisoners of war. The Qur’an rooted this out by legislating that prisoners of war should be freed at all costs – either by accepting ransom or as a favour by not taking any ransom money. No other option was available to the Muslims.[14]
10. Finally the following directive was given:
وَالَّذِينَ يَبْتَغُونَ الْكِتَابَ مِمَّا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُكُمْ فَكَاتِبُوهُمْ إِنْ عَلِمْتُمْ فِيهِمْ خَيْرًا وَآتُوهُمْ مِنْ مَالِ اللَّهِ الَّذِي آتَاكُمْ (24 :33)
And if any of your slaves ask for Mukatabat, give it to them if you know any good in them and [for this] give them out of the wealth which Allah has given to you. (24:33)
The above quoted verse of Surah Nur mentions the directive of ‘Mukatabat’. It is a term which means that a slave make a contract with his master according to which he would be required to pay a certain sum of money in a specific time period or would carry out a specific service for his master; once he successfully fulfills either of these two options, he would stand liberated. In the above quoted verse, the Almighty has directed the Muslims to necessarily accept this contract made by a slave if he wants to make it and has the required ability to become financially independent. It is further stated that a Muslim government should spend money from the public treasury, which here is called the treasury of God, in helping such slaves. It is evident from the words of the verse that just as this right of ‘Mukatabat’ was granted to slave-men, it was also granted to slave-women. This, in other words, was in fact a declaration that slaves could now be masters of their destiny and could obtain liberation whenever they wanted.
11. Prohibition of Plucking Facial Hair
On the basis of the following Hadith, it is believed that women are not allowed to pluck their facial hair:
حدثنا محمد بنيوسف حدثنا سفيان عن منصور عن إبراهيم عن علقمة عن عبد الله قال لعن اللهالواشمات والموتشمات والمتنمصات والمتفلجات للحسن المغيرات خلق الله فبلغ ذلك امرأةمن بني أسد يقال لها أم يعقوب فجاءت فقالت إنه بلغني أنك لعنت كيت وكيت فقال وماليلا ألعن من لعن رسول اللهومن هو في كتاب الله فقالت لقد قرأت ما بين اللوحين فماوجدت فيه ما تقول قال لئن كنت قرأتيه لقد وجدتيه أما قرأت ]وما آتاكم الرسول فخذوهوما نهاكم عنه فانتهوا [قالت بلى قال فإنه قد نهى عنه قالت فإني أرى أهلك يفعلونهقال فاذهبي فانظري فذهبت فنظرت فلم تر من حاجتها شيئا فقال لو كانت كذلك ماجامعتنا
‘Abdullah Ibn Mas‘ud has reported: ‘Allah curses those ladies who practice tattooing and those who get themselves tattooed, and those ladies who remove the hair from their eyebrows and faces and those who make artificial spaces between their teeth in order to look more beautiful whereby they change Allah’s creation’. His saying reached a lady from Bani Asad called Ummi Ya‘qub who came [to ‘Abdullah] and said: ‘I have come to know that you have cursed such-and-such (ladies)?’ He replied: ‘Why should I not curse those whom Allah’s Apostle has cursed and who are [cursed] in Allah’s Book!’ Ummi Ya‘qub said: ‘I have read the whole Qur’an, but I did not find in it what you say’. He said: ‘Verily, if you have read it [i.e. the Qur’an], you have found it. Didn’t you read: And whatsoever the Apostle gives you take it and whatsoever he forbids you, you abstain (from it), (59:7)’. She replied: ‘Yes, I did’. He said: ‘Verily, Allah’s Apostle forbade such things’. She said: ‘But I see your wife doing these things?’ He said: ‘Go and watch her’. She went and watched her but could not see anything in support of her statement. On that he said: ‘If my wife was as you thought, I would not keep her in my company’. (Bukhari,No: 4604)
One must always keep in consideration two fundamental principles while studying and interpreting Ahadith:
Firstly, to determine, as far as possible, the context and the background, all Ahadith on a particular subject should be collected and then analyzed as to ascertain the overall picture which emerges.
Secondly, they must be related to the Qur’an and Sunnah. This means that they must have a base in these two primary sources of Islam. They cannot and must not be taken independently.
Applying these principles to the above quoted Hadith shows that there were a number of practices (only some of which have been mentioned in this Hadith) which the Arab ladies used to undertake which entirely changed their natural physical appearance and some of which actually gave a false impression of their outward looks.
Almost all the major books of Hadith mention the various texts in which these practices have been narrated. The initial part of the Hadith mentioned above ‘... whereby change Allah’s creation’ itself suggests the relationship of this Hadith with the Qur’an: Verse 31 of Surah Rum, reads thus:
فِطْرَةَ اللَّهِ الَّتِي فَطَرَ النَّاسَ عَلَيْهَا لَا تَبْدِيلَ لِخَلْقِ اللَّهِ (30:30)
Follow the nature upon which Allah has created mankind. It is not proper to change this nature. (30:30)
It is in accordance with this principle mentioned in the Qur’an that the Prophet (sws) forbade a number of such practices. In other words, the nature – physical as well as spiritual – of a human being must be preserved in the shape Allah has created. Consequently, anything which may become a means of changing or modifying this nature is undesirable. However, a fine distinction exists between beautification to quench one’s aesthetic sense and alteration, the former being a permissible thing.
These Ahadith also mention a practice called ‘Tannamus’, which means removing the hair which extends on to the forehead in a particular style. This again was forbidden by the Prophet (sws). The Hadith you have mentioned contains this word; however it has been erroneously translated as ‘to remove hair from the face’.
In the light of this analysis, it is evident that removing hair from the face is something which the Prophet (sws) never forbade.
12. Going out without the Husband’s Permission
There is a Hadith which says that a lady must seek permission from her husband for going out:
عن بن عمر عن النبيأن امرأة أتته فقالت ما حق الزوج على امرأته فقال…لا تخرج من بيته إلا بإذنه (سنن البيهقي الكبرىرقم: 14490)
Ibn ‘Umarreports from the Prophet that once a lady came to the Prophet and asked him about the rights of a husband on his wife. He replied: … she should not leave his house without his permission. (Sunan Bayhaqi, No: 14490)
It needs to be appreciated that a family by analogy is similar to a state. All citizens of a state are expected to abide by the rules and regulations of the country they live in. They are expected to adopt an attitude of adjustment and harmony with the country. This, of course, does not mean that they cannot differ with its policies. They have the inalienable democratic right to differ and present their differences in a befitting manner. This submission is actually an essential requirement for discipline and order without which anarchy may result. Similarly, in the case of a family set up, it is essential that the person who is its head be shown obedience. In other words, submission to authority is not specific to the gender of the authority. Whoever is the authority, must be submitted to. Gender does not dictate submissiveness – it is authority which does. It is common knowledge that in different sphere of activities people have different abilities and justice entails that a person be made responsible according to his or her abilities and given authority on that basis. We have been informed by divine revelation that it is the husband who is more suitable to be the head of the family. Owing to this relative superiority, women are directed to submit to men not because men are superior human beings, but because in this particular case it is the men who have been vested with authority in accordance with 4:34. If women had been more suitable for the task of heading a family, men would have been similarly directed to adopt this attitude of adjustment.
Thus Islam requires that the wife adopt an attitude of adjustment and harmony with the husband and the husband is required to be affectionate and accommodating as far as possible to the needs of his wife. He must not impose any undue restrictions on her for this will ignite the wrath of God upon him.
With regard to a wife seeking her husband’s permission before leaving the house, the proper perspective must be understood. In general circumstances of mutual trust, there is no need for a wife to ask permission from her husband to go out. However, in certain circumstances in which the husband genuinely considers that going out might disrupt the family in any way, he has the authority to exercise his right of stopping her and in these circumstances, she should always ask permission to leave the house. In this regard, the husband must remember that if he imposes himself without any sound and justifiable reason, he would be crossing the bounds and invoking the displeasure of the Almighty. His wrong behavior may even lead the wife to abandon him for which he would be solely responsible.
13. ‘IddatRestrictions
It is generally held that divorced or widowed women must spend their ‘Iddat while being permanently stationed in their houses and wearing white clothes. Moreover, the ‘Iddat period is generally not spent at the husband’s house.
In this regard, the following points must be clearly understood:
Firstly, the basic reason for observing this period is to ascertain whether a lady is pregnant or not. It is to protect the lineage of the husband that she undergoes this wait. The words ‘فَمَا لَكُمْ عَلَيْهِنَّ مِنْ عِدَّةٍ’ (no period of ‘Iddat have they for you which you can ask them to complete) of Surah Ahzab clearly point to the fact that if pregnancy is a possibility then observing the ‘Iddat is an obligation imposed on the wife from the husband. Consequently, if a lady is past her child bearing age or if it can be determined through scientific means that a lady is not pregnant she will not be required to observe the ‘Iddat. On these very grounds, the Qur’an has exempted newly married women who have not gone near their husbands from ‘Iddat:
يَاأَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا إِذَا نَكَحْتُمْ الْمُؤْمِنَاتِ ثُمَّ طَلَّقْتُمُوهُنَّ مِنْ قَبْلِ أَنْ تَمَسُّوهُنَّ فَمَا لَكُمْ عَلَيْهِنَّ مِنْ عِدَّةٍ تَعْتَدُّونَهَا (49:33)
O you who believe! when you marry believing women, and then divorce them before you have touched them, no period of ‘Iddat have they for you which you can ask them to complete. (33:49)
Secondly, during ‘Iddat neither should a wife leave her house nor is the husband authorized to turn her out from her house. Living together might hopefully be beneficial for both and they might reconcile and thus save a family from breaking. The only exception to this is that if a wife is guilty of fornication in which case neither is it proper to demand from the husband to keep the wife in the house nor can the benefit be attained for which this directive had been given.
Thirdly, as far as the restrictions of ‘Iddat are concerned, all of them are based on protecting the lineage of the child that a widow or a divorced lady might be carrying. She can go out for any purpose which includes activities as austere as the Hajj and as light as an amusement park if she has made sure that this basic objective is not sacrificed.
Fourthly, for a widow, the ‘Iddat has its own sanctity and she should observe this period with solemnity and austerity. So natural is this observance that widows are not required to be told to dress and behave in accordance with the norms of the circumstances that face them.
14. Marriage with Minor Girls
There are some scholars who make the fourth verse of Surah 65 of Surah Talaq as basis of their opinion that Islam has allowed marriage and its consummation with minor girls. This is an erroneous conclusion. Marriage with minor girls is an issue which has not been discussed by the Qur’an at all.
However, the referred verse has nothing to do with this issue. If the linguistic principles of the Arabic language are taken into consideration, the correct translation of the last part of this verse is:
وَاللَّائِي يَئِسْنَ مِنَ الْمَحِيضِ مِن نِّسَائِكُمْ إِنِ ارْتَبْتُمْ فَعِدَّتُهُنَّ ثَلَاثَةُ أَشْهُرٍ وَاللَّائِي لَمْ يَحِضْنَ (4:65)
And those of your women who have ceased menstruating and those women whose menstrual courses have not begun in spite of the fact that they have reached the age in which women normally have menses, their waiting period is three months as well. (65:4)
This translation stems from the fact that the Arabic particle used for negation in this verse is Lamm (لَمْ)and not Ma(مَا).The verse is generally translated by disregarding this subtle difference as:
وَاللَّائِي يَئِسْنَ مِنَ الْمَحِيضِ مِن نِّسَائِكُمْ إِنِ ارْتَبْتُمْ فَعِدَّتُهُنَّ ثَلَاثَةُ أَشْهُرٍ وَاللَّائِي لَمْ يَحِضْنَ (4:65)
And those of your women who have ceased menstruating andthose women whose menstrual courses have not begun, their waiting period is three months as well. (65:4)
Consequently, it is generally construed that in this verse the ‘Iddat (waiting period) of those divorced women (girls more so) is stated who have yet to reach the age of puberty. So the proponents of this view infer that Islam allows marriage with minor girls.
15. Refusing Sex to the Husband
On the basis of the following Hadith, it is generally understood that if a wife refuses sex to her husband she will be cursed by the angels:
عن أبي هريرة رضي الله عنه عنالنبيقال إذا دعا الرجل امرأته إلى فراشه فأبت فبات غضبان عليها لعنتها الملائكة حتى تصبح (بخارى , رقم: 3065)
When a husband calls his wife to bed, and she refuses and [as a result] the husband spends the night in anger, then angels curse the wife all night till dawn. (Bukhari, No: 3065)
In order to understand this Hadith, the following points need to be understood:
Firstly, a husband and wife safeguard the chastity of one another by providing one another a legitimate means of satisfying the sexual urge. This protection of chastity is essential for the preservation of the family unit – the very institution on which the stability of a society hinges. Hence anything which puts chastity in jeopardy is disliked by the Almighty.
Secondly, a man is an addressee of the directive mentioned in this Hadith on an equal basis. This is evident from the directive of Ila mentioned in the Qur’an (2:226-7) in which the Arabs of the pre-Islamic period would swear to sever sexual relationship with their wives because of anger. Although the husbands were prescribed a period of four months to decide the fate of their wives by either resuming these relations or divorcing her, it is evident from the directive that in normal circumstances a husband is not allowed to sever sexual relations from his wife without a valid reason. So much so, if a person swears such an oath, he must break it. Such relations are the right of a wife and if a husband does not fulfill them, then he can be regarded a criminal both in the eyes of the law and before the Almighty in the Hereafter.
Thirdly, the basis of refusal by the husband or wife must also be taken in consideration. If either of them is tired, sick or simply not in the proper mood and in the appropriate frame of mind then it does not entail any wrath of the Almighty. It is only when a spouse starts to deliberately evade such natural needs of the other that the attitude becomes questionable.
16. The Right to Beat Wives
The right given by the Qur’an to the husbands to physically punish their wives in certain circumstances is a thorny issue in the modern mind. The issue needs to be understood in its true perspective. The Qur’an says:
وَاللَّاتِي تَخَافُونَ نُشُوزَهُنَّ فَعِظُوهُنَّ وَاهْجُرُوهُنَّ فِي الْمَضَاجِعِ وَاضْرِبُوهُنَّ فَإِنْ أَطَعْنَكُمْ فَلَا تَبْغُوا عَلَيْهِنَّ سَبِيلًا إِنَّ اللَّهَ كَانَ عَلِيًّا كَبِيرًا(34:4)
And as for those from whom you fear rebellion, admonish them [first] and [next] refuse to share their beds and [even then if they do not listen] punish them. Then if they obey you, take no further action against them. Indeed, Allah is Exalted and Mighty. (4:34)
The following implications of this verse need to be understood in their proper perspective:
a. Firstly, this measure can only be resorted to when a wife starts to challenge the authority of the husband and threatens to disrupt the family set-up. It is in fact a last resort to protect the institution of family from breaking up. It must not be resorted to in anything less in severity than a rebellious attitude from the wife. This rebellious attitude is termed as ‘نُشُوز’ (Nushuz) by the Qur’an. Ithas not used the word ‘disobedience’. Any difference of opinion or altercation is not to be resolved by this procedure. Disagreements and disputes must be settled mutually. It is only when the wife stands up against the authority of her husband that this procedure be employed.
b. Before resorting to physical chastisement, the two previous stages mentioned by the Qur’an (4:34) must elapse. The husband should first of all admonish his wife and convince her to give up her defiant behavior. He should exercise all the patience he can muster to urge and beseech her to change her stance. If after repeated pleas and continuous admonition over a considerable span of time, the wife continues to persist in her rebellious attitude, he has the authority to go on to the second stage by avoiding marital contact with her. This detachment, it is clear, is a form of reproof, and a very strong appeal to the wife to correct herself. Again, this attitude should continue for a substantial period of time so that the point is driven home. It is highly unlikely that most wives would persist in their arrogance after these two initial stages. In all probability, patience, forbearance, and restraint would have conquered their hearts. However, even after this stage, if a wife refuses to accept the authority of her husband, the husband has the right to finally resort to gentle physical affliction.
c. If the husband is left with no alternative but to physically punish his wife, he must be very careful in this regard and must not wound or injure her. He should remember that this physical chastisement is similar to the one a mother gives to a rebellious son or the one a teacher gives to an unruly student. He must be aware that in case he misuses this authority in any way, he would be held responsible before the Almighty on the Day of Judgement. In this world also, his wife has the right to report his behavior to the authorities who can punish him for any misconduct in this regard.
17.The Daughter’s Share in Inheritance
Why is the share of a daughter one half that of a son? Does this mean that sons occupy more importance than daughters? This issue too needs to be understood in its proper perspective.
It is a universally acknowledged fact that the extent of help and co-operation which a person receives from his parents, children and other similar relations has little chances of being paralleled by any other association. Undoubtedly, the world has always considered the kith and kin of a deceased as the rightful beneficiaries of the wealth he has left behind. But certain issues in this regard have always remained unresolved; for example, who among the kindred is nearest with respect to the benefit he holds for the deceased? And how should the inherited shares be ascertained on this basis? In this matter, the extent to which the human mind has faltered and stumbled can be seen from the frequent history these blunders have continued to make. It is not that human endeavour in this regard has fallen prey to any lack of application; rather it is due to certain inherent limitations of the human mind which have made the task itself beyond its reach. Love, hatred, prejudice and other emotions have made it impossible for human intellect to come to grips with this challenge. Consequently, the Almighty Himself has guided mankind in this affair to relieve an Islamic society from the disorders which have originated on this account:
آبَآؤُكُمْ وَأَبناؤُكُمْ لاَ تَدْرُونَ أَيُّهُمْ أَقْرَبُ لَكُمْ نَفْعاً فَرِيضَةً مِّنَ اللّهِ إِنَّ اللّهَ كَانَ عَلِيما حَكِيمًا (11:4)
You know not who among your children and parents are nearest to you in benefit. This is the law of God. Indeed, God is Wise and all-Knowing. (4:11)
It is clear from the above quoted verse that the law of inheritance as stated in the Qur’an is based on the underlying cause of ‘the benefit of kinship’, as indicated by the words
‘تَدْرُونَ أَيُّهُمْ أَقْرَبُ لَكُمْ نَفْعاًلاَ’ (you know not who among your children and parents are nearest to you in benefit). Consequently, the directive in reality does not pertain to the relatives but is related to the underlying cause present in this relationship, which actually entitles them to become the heirs.
Thus the basic reason why the share of a son is more than that of a daughter is the fact that in the life of parents the son is usually more beneficial to them than the daughter. This is so simple a fact that it can be easily understood in societies where the institution of family is still very strong and has deep roots. In a family system, parents become dependent on the children as they grow old. The ease and comfort they feel in living with a son is much more than what they feel while living with a daughter. The simple reason is that a son is independent in taking decisions while a daughter, once she gets married, is actually more dependent on her own husband and is not so independent. The modern western mind feels averse to this distribution because the family system is dwindling in their society.
One thing which may be worth mentioning here is that there may be cases even in societies having a strong family system where a daughter may prove more beneficial to her parent(s) than the son; similarly, there may be cases in which a daughter may require more monetary help because of her circumstances. This can of course be true for a son as well. In such cases, as per the following verse there is a provision that a daughter or a son be given more wealth through a will made in their favour:
كُتِبَ عَلَيْكُمْ إِذَا حَضَرَ أَحَدَكُمْ الْمَوْتُ إِنْ تَرَكَ خَيْرًا الْوَصِيَّةُ لِلْوَالِدَيْنِ وَالْأَقْرَبِينَ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ حَقًّا عَلَى الْمُتَّقِينَ (2 :180)
When death approaches any one of you and you are leaving behind some wealth, it is incumbent upon you to make a will in favour of your parents and relatives according to the conventions [of society]. This is an obligation imposed upon the God-fearing. (2:180)
As per another provision in Islamic law, a parent in his lifetime can gift as much wealth as is deemed necessary to a child.
In short, the 2:1 ratio pertains to normal circumstances; in exceptional ones there exist remedies in the Islamic law – some of which have been explained above.
Lastly, this difference of share is among the children only since the difference in benefit exists. On the other hand, as far as receiving the inheritance of a child is concerned, in most cases stipulated by Islamic law, both the mother and the father receive an equal share (ie one sixth) because for a child the benefit from a mother and a father is equal.
18. Polygamy
Some people are of the opinion that Islam has allowed a Muslim to keep up to four wives at one time since keeping four wives is a man’s essential physical and psychological need. This inference is not correct. In normal circumstances, a family comes into being through wedlock between one man and one woman. A subtle reference to this is made by the Qur’an (4:1) where it alludes to the fact that when the Almighty created Adam, he made Eve for him as his only wife. Naturally, had a man physically needed more than one wife, the Almighty would have created more wives for Adam instead of just one.
In this regard it should be understood that the issue of polygamy has been mentioned in the Qur’an as a means to make use of this pre-Islamic practice to solve a certain social problem that had arisen in those times: Many men were martyred in various battles leaving behind orphaned children. The Qur’an appealed to men of that society to come forward to help these orphaned children by marrying their mothers, since these mothers if supported would be in the best position for their upbringing. In other words, the view of the Qur’an is that people were taking to polygamy for various reasons and they would do a great service if they marry to solve the plight of these orphans. The Qur’an says:
وَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَلَّا تُقْسِطُوا فِي الْيَتَامَى فَانكِحُوا مَا طَابَ لَكُمْ مِنَ النِّسَاءِ مَثْنَى وَثُلَاثَ وَرُبَاعَ فَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَلَّا تَعْدِلُوا فَوَاحِدَةً أَوْ مَا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُكُمْ ذَلِكَ أَدْنَى أَلَّا تَعُولُوا وَآتُوا النِّسَاءَ صَدُقَاتِهِنَّ نِحْلَةً فَإِنْ طِبْنَ لَكُمْ عَنْ شَيْءٍ مِنْهُ نَفْسًا فَكُلُوهُ هَنِيئًا مَرِيئًا (4: 3-4)
And if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, marry [their mothers] that are lawful to you, two two, three three, four four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly [with them], then only one, or those which your right hands possess. That will be more suitable to prevent you from doing injustice. And give these women their dowers also the way dowers are given; but if they, of their own good pleasure, remit any part of it to you, take it and consume it gladly. (4:3-4)
It needs to be appreciated that it was basically social, psychological, political and cultural needs from which arose the need for polygamy. Such needs existed in various societies to different extents. To cater for these very needs the Almighty never forbade this practice in the Shari‘ah He gave in various periods of time. Here, in these verses, Muslims are directed to make use of this practice to solve a social problem that had arisen in the time of the Prophet (sws).
The next thing that a person should know is that as per the Qur’an if a person cannot maintain justice between his wives in this regard he should not marry more than one even for a purpose as noble as supporting the orphans. One can be more attached to one wife than the others. This is but natural and to demand justice in this matter is injustice itself. What is required from the husband as verse 4:3 points out is that as far as the rights of the wives are concerned, he must always deal fairly and equally among them. The Qur’an has further clarified this issue in the following words:
وَلَنْ تَسْتَطِيعُوا أَنْ تَعْدِلُوا بَيْنَ النِّسَاءِ وَلَوْ حَرَصْتُمْ فَلَا تَمِيلُوا كُلَّ الْمَيْلِ فَتَذَرُوهَا كَالْمُعَلَّقَةِ وَإِنْ تُصْلِحُوا وَتَتَّقُوا فَإِنَّ اللَّهَ كَانَ غَفُورًا رَحِيمًا وَإِنْ يَتَفَرَّقَا يُغْنِ اللَّهُ كُلًّا مِنْ سَعَتِهِ وَكَانَ اللَّهُ وَاسِعًا حَكِيمًا (4: 129-130)
And even if it is your ardent desire, you will never be able to be totally just between women; [so it is enough] if you do not completely incline yourself to a woman altogether, so as to leave the other aside. And if you come to a friendly understanding, and fear Allah; Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. But if they disagree and [eventually] must part, Allah will provide abundance for each from His bounty. He is Bountiful and Wise. (4:129-130)
There is another issue here that needs clarification since women often ask the reason for forbidding them to marry more than one husband. In this regard it needs to be understood that if a family is to come into being not only should there be only one head but also one person should not be placed under the command of multiple heads otherwise, great anarchy would result. So, just as a state cannot have more than one ruler, a family cannot have more than one head. Since, in the family set- up envisaged by Islam, husbands are to head the family, if a wife has multiple husbands, she would be placed under the authority of many husbands at the same time.
19. Marriage with the People of the Book
It is generally understood that Islam unconditionally allows Muslim men to marry Jewish and Christian women. However, the placement and context of the Qur’anic verse which permits such marriages show that it is desirable that certain conditions be met if such a marriage is to take place. Needless to say, the Qur’an has been revealed as a coherent Book. It is not a disjointed collection of verses as is generally believed. There is profound structural and thematic coherence in it. Each verse has a definite context and until and unless this context is carefully kept in consideration, the true implications of a verse can usually not be ascertained. Disregarding the context of a verse often leads to serious misinterpretations which distort the stance of the Qur’an. It is therefore of paramount importance that each verse be interpreted in the light of its context.
Consider now the context of the related verse. The following verse immediately precedes it:
الْيَوْمَ يَئِسَ الَّذِينَ كَفَرُواْ مِن دِينِكُمْ فَلاَ تَخْشَوْهُمْ وَاخْشَوْنِ الْيَوْمَ أَكْمَلْتُ لَكُمْ دِينَكُمْ وَأَتْمَمْتُ عَلَيْكُمْ نِعْمَتِي وَرَضِيتُ لَكُمُ الإِسْلاَمَ دِينًا(5: 3)
This daythe disbelievers have abandoned all hope of vanquishing your religion. Have no fear of them: fear Me. This day I have completed your religion for you and completed My favour upon you and have chosen for you Islam as your religion. (5:3)
Consider next, the verse under consideration:
الْيَوْمَ أُحِلَّ لَكُمُ الطَّيِّبَاتُ وَطَعَامُ الَّذِينَ أُوتُواْ الْكِتَابَ حِلٌّ لَّكُمْ وَطَعَامُكُمْ حِلُّ لَّهُمْ وَالْمُحْصَنَاتُ مِنَ الْمُؤْمِنَاتِ وَالْمُحْصَنَاتُ مِنَ الَّذِينَ أُوتُواْ الْكِتَابَ مِن قَبْلِكُمْ إِذَا آتَيْتُمُوهُنَّ أُجُورَهُنَّ مُحْصِنِينَ غَيْرَ مُسَافِحِينَ وَلاَ مُتَّخِذِي أَخْدَانٍ(5: 6)
This dayall things good and pure are made lawful to you. The food of the People of the Book is lawful to you, and yours to them. Lawful to you are the chaste among the believing women and the chaste women among the People of the Book, provided that you give them their dowries and desire chastity neither committing fornication nor taking them as mistresses. (5:6)
It is clear from the above mentioned verses that these directives pertain to the period when the supremacy of Islam had been established in Arabia – when the disbelievers had lost all hope of overcoming the Islamic forces and the Muslims had become an unconquerable force. It was in these circumstances that the Muslims were permitted to marry Jewish and Christian women. Moreover, it is evident from the verse that only virtuous and upright women among the People of the Book were allowed to be taken in marriage. It is evident that in such conditions and circumstances, there was virtually no possibility of the Muslims being influenced by their religions directives and cultural traditions. Instead, there was a far greater possibility that such marriages would positively influence the women of the People of the Book by inducing them to accept Islam.
By analogy, therefore, such marriages today seem desirable only in societies where the cultural traditions and legal injunctions of Islam hold sway.
20. The Issue of Wali (Guardian) in Marriage
Is it imperative to seek the consent of the parents or guardians in a marriage? This question has assumed great importance in this era since some marriages are taking place against the wishes of the parents and guardians.
In this regard the stance of Islam is that the consent of the parents/guardians is not a legal requirement of marriage. The legal requirements are only two: the man and woman who intend to get married must be chaste and a man must pay dower (Mahr) to his wife. However, the consent of the parents/guardians is a cultural and social requirement of marriage. Narratives like ‘لَا نِكَاحَ اِلَّا بِوَلِى’ (No marriage should take place without the [permission of] the guardian)[15] and other similar ones actually allude to this aspect. They are a corollary of the social directives of Islam pertaining to the institution of family and is based on great wisdom. Since the preservation and protection of the family set-up is of paramount importance to Islam, it is but natural that marriage takes place through the consent of the parents who are the foremost guardians. It is obvious that a marriage solemnized through the consent of the parents shields and shelters the newly formed family.
However, there can always be an exception to this general principle. If a man and a woman feel that the rejection on the part of the parents has no sound reasoning behind it or that the parents, owing to some reason, are not appreciating the grounds of this union, they have all the right to take this matter to the courts of justice. It is now up to the court to analyze and evaluate the whole affair. If it is satisfied with the stance of the man and woman, it can give a green signal to them. In this case, as is apparent from a Hadith, the state shall be considered the guardian of the couple. On the other hand, if the court is of the view that the stand of the parents is valid, it can stop the concerned parties from engaging in wedlock. However, no one has the authority to invalidate a marriage that has not been solemnized through the consent of the parents or the guardian.