Divorce (Part 2/2)
Islamic Law
Our jurists add to the above mentioned three conditions and say that a lady can only be divorced from this second husband once the two have had sexual intercourse. Without this, she is not legally allowed to become the wife of her first husband. They generally present the following three reasons in support of their view:
Firstly, the verb ‘تَنْكِحَ’ (she marries) has been used by the Qur’an. In this verb, the act of marriage has been attributed to the lady. However, since a lady does not contract marriage, rather a man does, so, ‘تَنْكِحَ’ here necessarily imply sexual intercourse.
Secondly, the word ‘زُوْجاً غَيْرَهُ’ (another husband) are used after ‘تَنْكِحَ’. The word ‘زُوْجاً’ is clearly pointing to the fact that the marriage has already been taken place; hence, it is imperative that ‘تَنْكِحَ’ here necessarily imply sexual intercourse.
Thirdly, it has been reported that once the Prophet (sws) stopped a lady from marrying her first husband by saying that she is not legally allowed to marry him until she has had sexual intercourse with the first.
The answer to the first and the second of these arguments is clearly given by the Qur’an:
وَإِذَا طَلَّقْتُمْ النِّسَاءَ فَبَلَغْنَ أَجَلَهُنَّ فَلَا تَعْضُلُوهُنَّ أَنْ يَنكِحْنَ أَزْوَاجَهُنّ(2:232)
And when you have divorced your wives and they have reached the end of their waiting period, do not prevent them from marrying their future husbands. (2:232)
It is evident from this verse that the act of marriage has been attributed to the lady and the word ‘أَزْوَاجَهُنّ’ are used in the same sense as ‘زُوْجاً غَيْرَهُ’, but it is obvious that the words ‘أَنْ يَنكِحْنَ’ refer to the marital knot and cannot in any way be construed for sexual intercourse.
Moreover, it is quite strange to contend that the act of marriage cannot be attributed to the lady. One might dare ask that if this is not possible, then can sexual intercourse be attributed to her. Viewed on similar grounds, it is a man who in fact does it and not a woman.
As far as the third argument is concerned, it has arisen because of not understanding a Hadith. The way Imam Bukhari has narrated it in his Sahih clearly shows that the lady had gotten married only to become legally permissible for the first husband. Consequently, when she lied by saying that her husband was unable to establish marital contact with her, the Prophet (sws) scolded her and told her that she could now only go back to her first husband after tasting her second husband. This of course is not a condition that he imposed but it is the case of stating an impossibility: the implied meaning being that if according to her, her second husband does not have the ability to copulate with her then she can only be divorced from him after he copulates with her – which of course he will never since, according to her, he is not capable of it. Thus if anything can be adduced from this Hadith, it is prohibition of Halalah. It does not in anyway support the view of the jurists.
The text of the Hadith is as follows:
عَنْ عِكْرِمَةَ أَنَّ رِفَاعَةَ طَلَّقَ امْرَأَتَهُ فَتَزَوَّجَهَا عَبْدُ الرَّحْمَنِ بْنُ الزَّبِيرِ الْقُرَظِيُّ قَالَتْ عَائِشَةُ وَعَلَيْهَا خِمَارٌ أَخْضَرُ فَشَكَتْإِلَيْهَا وَأَرَتْهَا خُضْرَةً بِجِلْدِهَا فَلَمَّا جَاءَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ وَالنِّسَاءُ يَنْصُرُ بَعْضُهُنَّ بَعْضًا قَالَتْ عَائِشَةُ مَا رَأَيْتُ مِثْلَ مَا يَلْقَى الْمُؤْمِنَاتُ لَجِلْدُهَا أَشَدُّ خُضْرَةً مِنْ ثَوْبِهَا قَالَ وَسَمِعَ أَنَّهَا قَدْ أَتَتْ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ فَجَاءَ وَمَعَهُ ابْنَانِ لَهُ مِنْ غَيْرِهَا قَالَتْ وَاللَّهِ مَا لِي إِلَيْهِ مِنْ ذَنْبٍ إِلَّا أَنَّ مَا مَعَهُ لَيْسَ بِأَغْنَى عَنِّي مِنْ هَذِهِ وَأَخَذَتْ هُدْبَةً مِنْ ثَوْبِهَا فَقَالَ كَذَبَتْ وَاللَّهِ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ إِنِّي لَأَنْفُضُهَا نَفْضَ الْأَدِيمِ وَلَكِنَّهَا نَاشِزٌ تُرِيدُ رِفَاعَةَ فَقَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ فَإِنْ كَانَ ذَلِكِ لَمْ تَحِلِّي لَهُ أَوْ لَمْ تَصْلُحِي لَهُ حَتَّى يَذُوقَ مِنْ عُسَيْلَتِكِ قَالَ وَأَبْصَرَ مَعَهُ ابْنَيْنِ لَهُ فَقَالَ بَنُوكَ هَؤُلَاءِ قَالَ نَعَمْ قَالَ هَذَا الَّذِي تَزْعُمِينَ مَا تَزْعُمِينَ فَوَاللَّهِ لَهُمْ أَشْبَهُ بِهِ مِنْ الْغُرَابِ بِالْغُرَابِ(بخاريرقم:5377)
‘Ikramahnarrates that Rafa‘ah divorced his wife. Thereafter she married ‘Abdu’l-Rahman Ibn Zubayr Qurzi. A^’ishahsays that she came to her wearing a green cloak and complained of her husband and showed her her bruises – women do help one another – so when the Prophet (sws) came by, A^’ishahsaid: ‘I have only seen Muslim women being treated in such a way. Her skin is greener than her cloak’. ‘Ikramah says that when her husband came to know that she had complained to the Prophet (sws), he also came over to the Prophet (sws) along with his two sons from his other wife. Upon seeing her husband, she got hold of the end of her cloak letting it hang from her hand and remarked: My only complaint is that whatever he has is no more than this [soft cloth]. At this, ‘Abdu’l-Rahman said: ‘O Prophet (sws) of Allah she has told a lie! I am very strong and can satisfy her; the truth of the matter is that she is disobedient and wants to go back to Rafa‘ah’. When theProphet (sws) heard this, he said: ‘If this is the case then you shall not be permissible for Rafa‘ah unless ‘Abdu’l-Rahman tastes you’. Then, upon seeing the sons of ‘Abdu’l-Rahman, the Prophet (sws) remarked: ‘Are these your sons?’ When he replied in the affirmative, the Prophet said: ‘Do you tell such lies [O ‘Abdu’l-Rahman’s wife]. By God, these [young boys] resemble ‘Abdu’l-Rahman more than a crow resembles another crow. (Bukhari, No: 5377)
5. Whether the husband decides to divorce his wife or to take her back, in both cases the Qur’an directs him to call in two Muslim witnesses on his decision. The witnesses are directed to remain steadfast on the evidence they give. The reason for this directive is to ensure that either of the parties is not able to refute a decision made and to resolve any other dispute that may arise in this regard. Moreover, this would make the matter very transparent for the people and settle doubts and confusions that may surface.
The above paragraphs explain the correct way of divorce. If a person divorces his wife according to this prescribed way or takes her back during the ‘Iddat period, then his decisions shall stand legally implemented. However, if divorce is given in violation of the prescribed way, then this is a legal case that would require a court ruling. Two similar cases of importance which came before the Prophet (sws) are as follows:
The first of these is the case of ‘Abdullah Ibn ‘Umar (rta). When he divorced his wife during her menstrual cycle, ‘Umar (rta) presented his case before the Prophet (sws). The Prophet (sws) expressed his answer when he was informed of these details and said: ‘Ask him to take her back and retain her in wedlock until she enters her period of purity and then again passes through her menstrual cycle and is pure again. Then, if he wants, he can permanently retain her or divorce her without having intercourse with her because this is the beginning of ‘Iddat keeping regard of which the Almighty has directed a husband to divorce his wife.9
The second case is that of Rukanah Ibn ‘Abdi Yazid.By gathering all the narratives of this case, the whole situation that comes to light is that he had divorced his wife three times in one go. He then felt ashamed and presented his case before the Prophet (sws). The Prophet (sws) inquired: ‘How did you divorce her?’ He replied: ‘I divorced her three times in one go’. The Prophet (sws) again inquired: ‘What was your intention?’ He answered that he wanted to divorce her once only. The Prophet (sws) told him to reply on oath which he did and then said: ‘If this is the matter, then take her back. Only one divorce has been implemented’. Rukanah remarked: ‘O Prophet of Allah I had divorced her three times’. The Prophet said: ‘I know, take her back and this is not the proper way of divorcing a wife. The Almighty has said that if one must divorce his wife, he should do so keeping in consideration the ‘Iddat’.10
The foundations on which the decisions of the Prophet (sws) are based in both the above quoted cases are:
i. If divorce is not given according to the prescribed procedure but there is a possibility to make amends for the violation, then the sanctity of the law demands that amends be made.
ii. A person has the right to explain his statements. If he says that a particular statement was uttered by him without any intention or with full intention, his explanation can be accepted. The following words of the Prophet (sws) also relate to this very foundation: ‘Divorce given in a state of rage is not to be legally enforced and neither is the decision to liberate a slave in such a situation’ (Abu Da’ud, No: 2193).
iii. If a person says that he has divorced his wife three times, then this can mean that he has in fact divorced her three times and this can also be a statement that portrays the severity and intensity of his decision. Since both these possibilities exist when these words are said, hence any explanation of the speaker regarding the meaning in which he used them should also be acceptable. However, this does not mean that if there exist evidence contrary to the explanation made that such an explanation be accepted. A court has full authority to reject such an explanation if it is not satisfied. Consequently, when ‘Umar (rta) observed that people were no longer careful in uttering the divorce sentence he declared that he would not even accept a statement of explanation from the husband and three divorces pronounced would be counted as three.11
The Directive of ‘Iddat
Surah Talaqsays that divorce should be given keeping in view the ‘Iddat (waiting period).At another place, the Qur’an has explained that period of ‘Iddat is three menstrual cycles:
وَالْمُطَلَّقَاتُ يَتَرَبَّصْنَ بِأَنفُسِهِنَّ ثَلَاثَةَ قُرُوءٍ(2: 228)
And divorced women must keep themselves waiting for three menstrual cycles. (2:228)
In this verse, the Arabic word ‘قُرُوْء’ is the plural of ‘قَرْءٌ’. In Arabic, this word means both the ‘menstrual period’ and the ‘non-menstrual period’. While presenting his research on this word, Imam Amin Ahsan Islahiwrites:
After much deliberation on the root of the word and its derived forms, I have come to the conclusion that its real meaning is that of ‘menstruation’. However, since every menstrual period is followed by a period of purity (طُهْر), the word is also used in this meaning. This is similar to the usage of words ‘day’ for ‘night’ and vice versa. Every language has such words.12
The word ‘قَرْءٌ’ in the opinion of this writer as well means ‘menstruation’ because in these verses the real issue is to ascertain whether a lady is pregnant or not. It is the ‘period of menstruation’ which actually ascertains this and not the ‘period of purity’. Moreover, women are asked to wait in this period and this waiting period can only be ascertained through the menstrual cycle because its beginning can be known with certainty.
In normal circumstances, the ‘Iddat period is three menstrual cycles; however, if a woman does not menstruate because of advancing age or in spite of reaching puberty13, then the Qur’an has specified in Surah Talaq that the ‘Iddat period would be three months. It has also been stated that the ‘Iddat period of a pregnant lady extends to childbirth. In Surah Talaq, for women who do not menstruate because of old age, there also exists the condition of ‘إِنْارْتَبْتُمْ’ (if you are doubtful). While explaining this condition, Imam Amin Ahsan Islahiwrites:
It seems to me that the condition of ‘إِنْ ارْتَبْتُمْ’ (if you are doubtful) is to differentiate between a lady who does not menstruate because of age but has had sexual intercourse with her husband and a lady in similar state but who did not have sexual intercourse with her husband. For if a lady who does not menstruate because of age has had sexual intercourse with the husband there might be a chance of pregnancy if her state was temporary for some reason. A same situation may arise for a lady who has not menstruated in spite of reaching the age and she has sexual intercourse with her husband … It is possible that the question may arise in the mind of a person that if this was the case, then why did the Qur’an not explicitly state that the ‘Iddat of a lady who does not menstruate because of age and who has had sexual intercourse is three months. The answer to this question is that such a statement of the Qur’an would not have pointed to the underlying reason of ‘Iddat – which was essential to be highlighted. This underlying reason is not merely the fact that whether a lady has had sexual intercourse or not: it is the doubt that she may be pregnant.14
يَاأَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا إِذَا نَكَحْتُمْ الْمُؤْمِنَاتِ ثُمَّ طَلَّقْتُمُوهُنَّ مِنْ قَبْلِ أَنْ تَمَسُّوهُنَّ فَمَا لَكُمْ عَلَيْهِنَّ مِنْ عِدَّةٍ تَعْتَدُّونَهَا (49:33)
O you who believe! when you marry believing women, and then divorce them before you have touched them, no period of ‘Iddat have they for you which you can ask them to complete. (33:49)
The directives of ‘Iddat which are mentioned in the relevant verses of Surah Talaq are:
Firstly, during ‘Iddat neither should a wife leave her house nor is the husband authorized to turn her out from her house. Living together might hopefully be beneficial for both and they might reconcile and thus save a family from breaking. The Qur’anic words ‘لَعَلَّ اللَّهَ يُحْدِثُ بَعْدَ ذَلِكَ أَمْرًا’ (You know not that God might thereafter create new circumstances) point to this very aspect. Further, a warning is sounded that the directives mentioned are the bounds set by Allah and any one who tries to exceed them would not harm Allah in any way; on the contrary, he would only harm his own well-being. It is not that the Almighty has set these bounds for His own benefit. It is for the welfare of His creation that He has set them forth; so any one who violates them only wrongs his own soul.
The only exception to the above directive is if the basis on which a divorce has been given is open lewdness which the Qur’an has termed as ‘فَاحِشَة مُبَيِّنَة’. In the Arabic language, this expression implies fornication and other lesser forms of sexual contact. Obviously, in such a situation neither is it proper to demand from the husband to keep the wife in the house nor can the benefit be attained for which this directive had been given.
Secondly, it is stated that a husband should provide residence and maintenance to his divorced wife according to his status. After divorce, a husband can be very stingy in this regard. Consequently, he has been directed not to provide her in a manner that damages her self-esteem. He should provide according to his resources and the social status he is maintaining. It is further stated that in this period a husband should in no way try to make life difficult for his wife so that she is forced to leave her house herself.
It is obvious that after the pronouncement of the third divorce also, a husband shall be responsible to provide residence and maintenance to the divorced wife. The reason is that a lady accepts to remain in ‘Iddat only to ascertain whether she is the mother of his child or not. It is to protect his lineage that she undertakes this wait. The words ‘فَمَا لَكُمْ عَلَيْهِنَّ مِنْ عِدَّةٍ’ (no period of ‘Iddat have they for you which you can ask them to complete) of the above quoted verse of Surah Ahzab clearly point to the fact that if there pregnancy is a possibility then observing the ‘Iddat is an obligation imposed on the wife from the husband. Indeed, after the third divorce, a husband does not have any right to revoke his decision and take back his wife; however, as a result of this, the only thing that can be revoked is their living together. In no way can the responsibility to provide her with residence and maintenance be revoked. Consequently, this is absolutely certain that whether ‘Iddat is three menstrual cycles, three months or extend to the birth of the child, a husband is liable to provide her wife with residence as well as maintenance.
Here some people may object to the above view of this scribe by presenting the case of Fatimah bint Qays. It is narrated that her husband Abu ‘Amr had already divorced her twice. Then when he was sent to Yemen with ‘Ali (rta), he sent her the third divorce pronouncement as well. During her ‘Iddat, when she demanded residence and maintenance, the relatives of the husband refused this demand. At this, she came to the Prophet (sws), who decided that she has neither the right to be given residence nor any maintenance.15
The above referred to narrative is quoted in some books of Hadith, but it is evident from certain other narratives that when her case was presented before the Caliph ‘Umar (rta), he too refused her demand by saying that he could not accept the verdict of a lady which is against the Book of God and the Sunnah of his Prophet (sws).16 When in the time of Marwan Ibn Hakam, this case came into discussion for a third time, A%’ishah(rta) severely criticized this narrative. Qasim Ibn Muhammad inquired from A%’ishah(rta): ‘Are you not aware of the case of Fatimah bint Qays’.She replied: ‘It is better if you do not mention her matter.17 In another narrative, A%’ishah’s words are: ‘What has happened to Fatimah; does she not fear God.18 A third narrative is from ‘Urwah Ibn Zubayr. He says that A%’ishahsaid: Nothing will benefit Fatimah if she narrates this Hadith.19In still another narrative, ‘Urwah says that A%’ishahexpressed her anger for Fatimah and said: ‘She was in an empty house where none whom she knew lived and hence the Prophet (sws), for her own protection, had directed her to change her residence.20
This is the real background of this narrative; hence, no one should consider it of worthy of any importance.
Besides the above mentioned directives, the Almighty has given a further directive in Surah Baqarah that no lady should try to conceal her pregnancy during her ‘Iddat. It has been indicated a number of times earlier in this article that the very directive to observe the ‘Iddat has been given for ascertaining whether a lady is pregnant or not. Consequently, it is an essential outcome of this directive and the Almighty has forcefully directed us to observe it:
وَالْمُطَلَّقَاتُ يَتَرَبَّصْنَ بِأَنفُسِهِنَّ ثَلَاثَةَ قُرُوءٍ وَلَا يَحِلُّ لَهُنَّ أَنْ يَكْتُمْنَ مَا خَلَقَ اللَّهُ فِي أَرْحَامِهِنَّ إِنْ كُنَّ يُؤْمِنَّ بِاللَّهِ وَالْيَوْمِ الْآخِرِ (2: 228)
And divorced women must keep themselves waiting for three menstrual courses. And it is unlawful for them, if they believe in Allah and the Last Day to hide what He has created in their wombs. (2:228)
After Divorce
Once a divorce is actualized, one issue that can become a source of dispute is suckling of young children. In the under discussion verses of Surah Talaq,the Almighty has said that if their mother is willing to suckle them, then the husband shall pay her for this service and this remuneration shall be ascertained through mutual consultation and in a befitting manner. If such an agreement is not reached between the parents, then according to the Qur’an any woman can be asked to feed the children. It is also told that a rich person should spend according to his means and resources and a poor one according to his. Neither is it permitted for the rich person to deal with others in a manner that is below his status and neither should a poor person be burdened beyond his means. The Almighty holds a person responsible to obey His directives according to his capacity and status.
In Surah Baqarah, this directive has been mentioned in detail:
وَالْوَالِدَاتُ يُرْضِعْنَ أَوْلَادَهُنَّ حَوْلَيْنِ كَامِلَيْنِ لِمَنْ أَرَادَ أَنْ يُتِمَّ الرَّضَاعَةَ وَعَلَى الْمَوْلُودِ لَهُ رِزْقُهُنَّ وَكِسْوَتُهُنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ لَا تُكَلَّفُ نَفْسٌ إِلَّا وُسْعَهَا لَا تُضَارَّ وَالِدَةٌ بِوَلَدِهَا وَلَا مَوْلُودٌ لَهُ بِوَلَدِهِ وَعَلَى الْوَارِثِ مِثْلُ ذَلِكَ فَإِنْ أَرَادَا فِصَالًا عَنْ تَرَاضٍ مِنْهُمَا وَتَشَاوُرٍ فَلَا جُنَاحَ عَلَيْهِمَا وَإِنْ أَرَدْتُمْ أَنْ تَسْتَرْضِعُوا أَوْلَادَكُمْ فَلَا جُنَاحَ عَلَيْكُمْ إِذَا سَلَّمْتُمْ مَا آتَيْتُمْ بِالْمَعْرُوفِوَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ وَاعْلَمُوا أَنَّ اللَّهَ بِمَا تَعْمَلُونَ بَصِيرٌ(223)
And [after divorce also] mothers shall suckle their offspring for two whole years, for those who desire to complete the term. And the child’s father [in such a case] shall have to bear the cost of their food and clothing according to the norms. No one should be burdened beyond his capacity. Neither shall the mother be treated unfairly because of her child, nor the father on account of his child – and an heir shall be accountable in the same way – But if they both decide on weaning by mutual consent and after due consultation, there is no blame on them. And if you decide to engage someone else to suckle upon your offspring, there is no blame on you, provided you pay [the mother] in accordance with the norms [of the society] what you promised. But fear Allah and know that Allah sees well what you do.
ImamAmin Ahsan Islahi,while summarizing the directives of suckling that these verses mention, writes:
i) It is the responsibility of a divorced lady to suckle her offspring for two full years in case the husband wants her to complete the total suckling period.
ii) During this period, it is the responsibility of the father to provide his divorced wife with food and clothing, keeping in view the norms of the society. In other words, the status of the husband, the needs of the divorced wife and her own status shall be kept in consideration while providing her this maintenance.
iii) Neither of the parties shall be burdened beyond their capacity. Neither the mother shall be harmed in any way by taking advantage of the fact that she is the mother of the child nor the father be unduly pressurized in any way on the pretext that he is the father of the child.
iv) If the father of the child is dead, his heirs will be responsible for all the above mentioned rights and obligations.
v) If through mutual consent and consultation, the estranged husband and wife decide to terminate the suckling period before two years, they can do so.
vi) If the child’s father or, in his absence, the heirs of the child want to suckle the child from through some other lady instead of the mother, they are authorized to do so provided what has been agreed with the mother regarding her maintenance is fully honored.21
The second thing which can become a source of dispute is the husband’s attitude of hindering further marriage of his former wife. This attitude whether in the form of open forbiddance on his part or in the form of covert and stealthy schemes has been strictly prohibited by the Almighty in Surah Baqarah. He has counseled people that once a lady has been divorced, her former husband has no right to cause hindrance in any decision she makes. She has the liberty to marry wherever and whenever she wants. If her decision to marry is in accordance with the norms of the society, it cannot be objected to in any way. The Qur’an uses the word ‘الْمَعْرُوف’ to convey this meaning. This word implies that though a man and a woman are totally free to take their decision, they must remember not to do anything that is against the norms of decency and which may damage the honour and repute of the former or future husband or of the family of the woman herself. The Qur’an says:
وَإِذَا طَلَّقْتُمْ النِّسَاءَ فَبَلَغْنَ أَجَلَهُنَّ فَلَا تَعْضُلُوهُنَّ أَنْ يَنكِحْنَ أَزْوَاجَهُنَّ إِذَاتَرَاضَوْا بَيْنَهُمْ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ ذَلِكَ يُوعَظُ بِهِ مَنْ كَانَ مِنْكُمْ يُؤْمِنُ بِاللَّهِ وَالْيَوْمِ الْآخِرِ ذَلِكُمْ أَزْكَى لَكُمْ وَأَطْهَرُ وَاللَّهُ يَعْلَمُ وَأَنْتُمْ لَا تَعْلَمُونَ(2:232)
And when you have divorced your wives and they have reached the end of their waiting period, do not prevent them from marrying their future husbands if they have come to an agreement according to the norms [of decency]. These words of advice are given to every one of you who believes in Allah and the Last Day; this is more decent for you and more chaste. And [in reality] Allah knows, but you do not. (2:232)
While explaining the last part of the verse ImamAmin Ahsan Islahiwrites:
These sound words of advice are being given to those who believe in Allah and the Last Day. In other words, those who have belief in Allah and the Last Day should follow what is being advised since this is the outcome of true belief. Such an attitude is more pure and seemly. If a lady is impeded in anyway to re-marry, this may result in great evils in the family and society. It is from here that back doors to clandestine relations and fornication are opened, eventually bringing great disrepute to those whose false pride induces them to obstruct natural emotions through worthless customs. The words ‘And Allah knows, but you do not’, at the end imply that man’s knowledge and vision is very limited. He cannot fully grasp the ups and downs of life; therefore, he should follow what the Almighty is directing him to do.22
Besides the above mentioned two issues, a third matter that can cause dissension between the divorced couple is the custody of children. The Shari‘ah has not given any directive in this regard because this matter can only be decided keeping in view the welfare of the children and the circumstances of the parents, which of course vary a lot. However, those in authority can obtain a lot of guidance in this regard from the various cases decided by the Prophet (sws). Following is an account of some of them.
‘Abdullah Ibn ‘Umar(rta) narrates that a lady came to the Prophet (sws) and said: ‘For this son of mine, it is only my belly which was his abode, and my breasts which were his vessel and my lap which was his dwelling place. Now his father has divorced me and wants to take him away from me. The Prophet replied: ‘You are more entitled to keep him until you marry again’.23
Abu Hurayrah(rta) narrates that in his presence once a lady came to the Prophet. I heard her saying: ‘My husband wants to take away from me this child even though he has brought over water for me from the well of Abu ‘Anbah and given me a lot of benefit’. The Prophet replied: ‘Both of you can cast a lot on this’. [Upon hearing this], the husband said: ‘Who will quarrel with me regarding this son of mine’. The Prophet asserted: ‘O son! This is your father and this is your mother; grasp the hand of the one you want to hold’. The child grasped the mother’s hand and she took him away.24
(Translated from ‘Mizan’ by Shehzad Saleem)