1. Mention some of the common sins that we commit through the tongue?
i. abusing and cursing
ii. making fun
iv. misreporting facts
vi. wrongly blaming others
vii. lustful chatting
viii. checking facts before reporting
ix. bearing false witness to save a friend
x. false oaths
xi. showing off
xiii. enticing others to sin
ix. showing disrespect to parents
x. imperious contempt of the inferiors / arrogance
xi. idle talk
xii. gossip / loose talk
xiv over reacting
xv. being judgemental
xvi. talking too much
xvii. taunting and teasing
xx. giving bad titles
xxi. not hiding secrets of the spouse
xxii. breaking promises
xxiii. defrauding others
xxiv. discouraging others
xxv. giving wrong advice
xxvi. taunting and teasing
2. How can we control our anger?
Short Term Measures
i. Changing of posture: for example, if we are sitting, we should stand up and vice versa.
ii. Drawing deep breaths: it is recommended that we take ten deep breaths.
iii. Repeating relaxing phrases: we should slowly repeat a calming word or phrase such as: “relax” and “take it easy,” while we are breathing deeply.
iv. Drinking a glass of water.
v. Changing location: thus only leaving the place where one has experienced this surge in temper helps.
vi. Finding a physical release: It is suggested that “an angerworkout” be done. Thus hitting a mattress with a tennis racket or slapping the sofa with a bat or punching a pillow releases the pressure built within us.
vii. Talking to God: some of the above measures may not completely release our anger, and in spite of controlling it for the time being one may find its surge arising later. In such cases, it is best to talk with God and share our pain and anguish with Him. Inevitably, we will feel relieved.
Long Term Measures
i. Figuring out what generally triggers our anger viz a viz our relatives and friends as well as situations: once we are able to calmly evaluate these triggers, we should try our best that we stay away from scenarios that cause these triggers.
ii. Giving ourselves positive messages: this is particularly useful when anger is caused by a person. In this regard, we should always look at the qualities of that person, and any benefit we may have received from him or her.
iii. Learning to relax in our lives: if we take regular time out in our daily routines to relax and enjoy we tend to become individuals who in general are not stressed out; a relaxed body has relaxed nerves that provide a tremendous buffer in critical situations.
iv. Visualizing our response: we should imagine and visualize what we should do when the crunch time comes. We should talk to ourselves about how we will react and what we will say when it happens. This may save us from spur of the moment flare ups which really can cause great harm and havoc.
v. Following exemplary people: we human beings are weak by nature and need encouragement and inspiration from role models. It is really worthwhile to read stories and anecdotes of people whose exemplary patience and forbearance in testing times make them unlikely victors.
vi. Reminding ourselves that no one is perfect: most of the time anger results because of various imperfections in life that we come across. We should continue to remind our selves that we have to live with imperfections – foremost with one’s own and remember that these may be a cause of anger for others. So if others tolerate us we should reciprocate this attitude.
vii. Learning to forgive: forgiveness mitigates anger. We expect God to forgive us for our own blemishes; all the more reason that we should forgive others in return for their faults and shortcomings.
These measures may prove helpful in restraining our fury. However, in spite of trying hard to contain anger, we humans can still err and lose our cool. And when we do, two things that befit us are:
i. We must always apologize to the aggrieved person.
ii. We should impose a monetary fine on ourselves and then spend the collected money in the interest and welfare of the aggrieved person.
3. Mention some virtues of soft speech
i. it teaches us wisdom
ii. other people trust us and like to be with us
iii. inner purification is achieved
iv. seldom will anyone speak badly with us
v. it is the sign of a leader
Quiz Marking Scheme
How Careful are you in your Conversation?